Overheard At An Airport Lounge
overheard at an airport lounge
first person: (slightly inebriated) look at that thing
second person (with a glazed look checking his papers looks up in the direction of the thing and says nothing)
fp: you don't find her attractive?
sp: do i know you?
fp: cheer up bud, (pointing to bar tender) one more for my friend
sp: (mumbles thanks)
fp: aren't you glad at leaving this rat hole?
sp: glad? yes, yes very glad
fp: look, she is smiling in this direction
sp: is that a smile? i can't see through this haze
fp: look at those legs
sp: legs? smile?
fp: cheer up buddy, life is short
sp: i intend to soon as i get on board
fp: i am going to dublin, you?
sp: t.o.
fp: i sell conveyor belts. she crossed her legs. wow!
sp: (grunt)
fp: hey buddy, send her her drink on me
sp: (does his wife know how he behaves in foreign airports?)
fp: and one more for my friend here
sp: thanks. can i make a suggestion, sir?
fp: (getting loud now) anything my friend
sp: go easy on the drinks. they may deny you boarding
fp: screw them. nobody can stop me. hey she is coming over
(leggy woman looks at the second person and says:) can i sit here
sp: (pointing at fp) he sent you the drink
lw: (ignoring the comment repeats) may i sit here
fp: i am jim
lw: thank you jim. may i have a word with your friend here?
fp: sure sure. i sell conveyor belts.
lw: that must be exciting. thank you
***
(fp scans others in the bar. 15 minutes later the lw's flight is announced and she leaves)
***
fp: hey bud, did you hit off?
sp: hit off?
fp: did you find her attractive?
sp: attractive? she asked me why i looked distraught...
fp: those legs
sp: ...i told her i missed my flight...
fp: did you find her attractive
sp:... and she told me she was heading east
fp: east, west, west, east, east, west, west....
sp: (he will certainly be denied boarding)
fp: you got her number?
sp: no, not interested
fp: are you gay
sp: no
fp: you must be gay, you did not get her number
sp: (grabbing his papers and bag) i have a flight to catch
fp: you must be gay
sp: (shrug) you can delude. am a poet. good bye
for the inspiration, thanks are due to saks and beady - t
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